What the hell is a spiritual loner extrovert???

Day 1 and Loading.
Day 1 and Loading….

Hello World…Welcome to my mind

Its 2015 and you know what there’s no better time to do this. I have too much in my mind not to find an outlet outside of your usual journal, scrap piece of paper and corner of a tissue! So I’ve always wanted to start a blog to generationally (not sure this exists) save my thoughts, revelations, theories and opinion on anything and everything! So here we go, as a way of introduction, let me explain my I named my blog “the memoirs of spiritual loner extrovert (SLE)…

They say women are complicated…psh! Can you sense that I disagree? No ways, women just need love and affection (cue Rihanna’s Love Song). We are incubators and give more of what we get and are not, against popular belief, all the same. Done. In 2 sentences I have described the woman…okay, now let me be serious.

Me the Extrovert: “I was here”

I, like all humans, am simply complicated. I believe I am a walking paradox…When you meet me, you probably were/are/will be a bit scared as I am “out there”, “intimidating”, “very sure of who you are”, “loud” or “crazeeeee” just to quote a few first time responses. Now I can look at all this to say I make my presence known and let my light shine (with no filter for who or what is in the room) or see it as an attempt to explain what I choose the world to see. Trust me when I say I believe my relational effectiveness is based on an “Portia was here” moment for everyone. You have to live a life where you are an asset in people’s lives and you are traceable by your unique noise, actions, words, impact and values.

I believe what we project is what we choose the world to see. Yes I am loud and crazy. The world says I am an extrovert…a ENTJ to be psychological. I do get energy from people, I do express in every way possible (thus the blog to add to my expressing outlets) and I reckon I adapt and get comfortable too quickly for most people’s comfort. Ahhh…ya neh!

Me the Loner: “1 man moment”

But (can I even start a sentence with but???…can’t recall grade 3 English lessons so forgive me), I actually love and can live in my own company for long periods of time, I am self motivated and think too much. A friend of mine would jump in at this point and say “no no no, on the contary, I believe people don’t think enough”. hahaha. Anyways, these would be indicative of an introvert right? But then I’m an extrovert! Through and through. So as not to offend the intoverts (many of which are in my circle of friends), I decided to call myself a loner.

A loner is not lonely, they are just alone. They are quite effective alone – from planning a seminar to writing a song – and are not afraid of hanging out with themselves. They know the power of private wars won publicly and have a “me against the world” view. Now someone may think its sad to be a loner, nahhh, I disagree, I truly believe that everything done on earth started with 1 man…this means that the vision, idea, goal etc. started with that 1 man. This means everyone needs time for their “1 man moment” so they can be effective. For us to see things clearly and live our lives we must have an element of “the loner” in us to block out the noise of the world cos man it is loud and unfortunately the music its playing is of uniformity, doubt, greed, discontentment, negativity and competition.

Me the Spiritual: ” God runs this”

Now I am aware of the millions of views on spirituality and the existence of God (or not). Frankly, I don’t care. God runs this. I love God and everything about Him. I am a christian woman who lives a life surrendered to a good God. If you want my heart or the essence of who I am; tap into my spirituality. I believe that we are spirits with a mind in a body. I believe we are made in God’s image and that we are destined to rule and dominate the world, not each other. I believe if we all understood what and who we are, we would solve the world’s problems as (1) there would be no competition as everyone would be operating in their unique calling and not trying to be someone else, (2) there would be no more greed and poverty as we would be using the world’s resources as we should and (3) there would be no war, strife or conflict amongst us as we would take after the nature of our Father. Now before you jump up and down tuning me for over summarising the world’s problems…before you spurt out hectic economic terms and the million and one societal, family and world issues that I haven’t addressed, note; luckily I am not a politician or a economic guru and so I have no qualification to sit and count all problems in the world. I just believe a root cause is lack of identity, leadership and truth.

This can be solved by the manufacturer alone as He is the only one who knows the operation of his creation. Check this; many times we buy the latest TV or gadget, throw away the manual and figure out the features as we go along. Now that’s okay, except that we use these at probably less than 50% of capacity and capability, often break things during trial and error and experience too many surprises as we try and figure it out. To fix it, we often take it to the manufacturer who would usually ask “have you read the manual” then proceed to fix it, whether by replacing parts or giving you a new one as what you bought is still under warantee. So..God is the manufacturer, His word the manual and the warrantee your lifetime. I am spiritual as I cannot live a life of trial and error or too many surprises…I refuse to live to half my capability or capacity. So, by choice, I know and continue to know my manufacturer, God. I choose to, in the words of the late Myles Munroe, DIE EMPTY of everything I have the potential to achieve.

I hope you enjoy reading this blog as I share my authentic and unapologetic thoughts, songs, ideas and experiences with you…and if you don’t like it, you shall be strong *sticks tounge out*